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Sign of Alien Life Discovered in Utah

I hate to be that guy, but I told you so.


I’ve been interested in myths and legends my entire life. At a young age, I started reading books about the lore surrounding creatures like Bigfoot and the Loch Ness monster. Unfortunately, as I’ve aged I’ve come to terms with the fact that most of these beasts are fake. No, a dinosaur isn't living in a Scottish lake, and that one Bigfoot video is obviously a fake. However, one tale went from myth to reality as I grew. Aliens are all but mathematically guaranteed and with the recent footage of UFOs released by the Pentagon, anyone who doesn’t believe is a sheep. That’s why the news coming out of Utah immediately grabbed my attention. A 10-12 foot metal monolith was found in the desert by the military, seemingly carved into the earth.

Due to my fascination with ancient legends, I have visited Roswell, New Mexico. Outside of the odd junkie and the McDonald’s shaped like a UFO, I can promise you no aliens were near that town. If aliens were around us, we wouldn’t find out by a bunch of desert hillbillies witnessing a crash just outside of town. This, on the other hand, is odd. It was embedded into the hard rock which would’ve taken time to carve, and heavy tools that needed to be transported to it's location.

The way I see it, there are three options. The first being aliens, in which case, it was an honor. The second, this is an elaborate marketing scheme for some shitty space movie. (Think Ad Astra but with a larger marketing budget). The third option is this is the most time-consuming prank of all time, in which case I tip my hat towards the prankster.


I think the most suss part of this entire story is how it was discovered. A military helicopter spotted it while “counting sheep”. Sure. Either the government is up to something shady, or they are burning money. Neither scenarios are that out of the blue, so I don’t know what to think. From a brief google search, it costs north of $400 an hour to fly a military helicopter, not including the cost of the crew. So the next time you destroy your car in a pothole, a family goes into debt after their child gets sick, or a student can’t afford lunch, just remember the government spends thousands a year counting sheep with your money.