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DJ Khaled Starts An OnlyFans

I'd rather burn $20 each month


DJ Khaled and Fat Joe have decided to team up and open an Only Fans account. When I saw this headline I immediately started ripping my house apart, looking for bleach to pour directly onto my eyeballs. Thankfully we were out of bleach and I'm too much of a spineless wimp to use a knife, so I went ahead and finished the article. Upon further inspection I discovered they would use their account to show their fans “the light”. By this they mean they will enlighten fans with positive energy, which is much better than showing off their FUPA’s on camera.

This is the same thing as when a 27 year old in a leased BMW is running a “How to be a Millionaire” class online, but more pathetic. At least the 27 year old is hustling to become a millionaire, these two have a combined net worth of nearly $80 million dollars, yet they still are charging fans $20 a month. DJ Khaled has been spreading “the light” for free on all social media platforms for years. While I respect him as an artist, he isn't very motivational. He uses broad phrases and screams into the front facing camera. If they truly wanted to enlighten fans they would give out helpful information for free.

On their OnlyFans, the duo will post motivational and inspirational talks, and guide fans to “the light,” while sharing uplifting insights. Fans will also get a glimpse into Khaled and Joe’s personal lives, and will see the pair play basketball, dine together, hang in the studio with special guests, and more.

There is no reality where a $20 per month only fans subscription is worth it. At least with most of the app you receive daily pics from babes, instead of two overweight males eating at high-end restaurants talking about “keys” and “staying woke” while occasionally pointing at the camera. They should be ashamed of themselves for even trying this stunt. If you are looking for a daily dose of enlightenment, there are thousands of people online who will do a better job for free. DJ Khaled, stick to the music buddy.