THIS IS NOT A DRILL: TOBEY MAGUIRE TO PLAY SPIDEY AGAIN

Women dream of their wedding day, parents dream of holding a grandchild for the first time, men dream of this. That’s right, Tobey Maguire is finally slipping back into the skin-tight Spiderman suit. Last night news broke that reportedly Toby Maguire and Andrew Garfield (no one cares) have signed on for the third movie in the Tom Holland franchise. I am beyond emotional; for a time I had almost given up hope that he would return to the big screen. Now that it is confirmed, you’re going to have to know what to expect.

The entire plot of Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse revolved around Spidermen from multiple dimensions teaming up to fight the villain. I'd have to guess the story for this movie will be similar, while involving Dr. Strange as the catalyst for this dimensional jump. I’m assuming Tobey’s Spiderman will be a mentor figure to Tom’s character, something he has been searching for since the death of Tony Stark. (Spoilers, deal with it) One of the characters will most likely be disheveled and beaten down. I’m going with Garfield’s Spidey, since last we saw he was a split second too late to save the love of his life. Whatever Garfield’s arc will be, I just want it to end as soon as possible. I view every minute with that failure as one minute lost with my beloved Tobey.

The original Spiderman film brought superhero movies into the limelight, paving the way for Spiderman 2, which is arguably the greatest film of all time. There aren’t many movies that have iconic, cinema-defining moments in it, but somehow Spiderman 2 has multiple. Everything from the train scene to “pizza time!” the film is a masterpiece.

I’m sick of boys playing Spiderman and I’m thrilled to get this alpha back. After watching the most recent Tom Holland adventure, my forehead was throbbing and bright red from how many times I banged it off the wall. Tobey and Kristen Dunst’s on-screen chemistry defined romance for an entire generation. I mean the upside down kiss in the rain? Come on! Watching Tom Holland and Zendaya nervously exchange glances and smiles makes me want to chew on glass.

My hope is that this inspires a new stand-alone Tobey movie. I want the old cast, the old suit, everything. Is the past always better? Depends how rose-tinted your glasses are but the answer is typically no. But I know for damn sure the original Spiderman trilogy is the second greatest superhero trilogy of all time, and I’m certain that magic can be recaptured. (First place obviously goes to the Dark Knight Trilogy.) Modern-day superhero films oversaturate the market. With weak, one-off villains, the stakes are rarely palpable. Any emotional investment in these films is ruined with cheap cameos and horribly timed zingers.

Tobey guided us into the cinematic superhero era, and he will be the hero we need to lead us back to its golden age. Tom Holland’s third Spidey movie just went from a hard pass to a must-watch. Tobey, if you’re reading this, we never gave up hope. You are the one, true, Spiderman.